What generates low self confidence?
It is believed that not being confident is caused, in part, by negative emotional responses, negative thoughts. Criticism, teasing, punishment and abuse, poverty, economic deprivation, failure in school and many other factors affect our feelings of self worth and cause people to not be confident in their decision making when it comes to finding solutions to their problems. Even race, religion, the media, culture and sex have an influence on how we feel about ourselves.
If we are confident in ourselves, finding solutions is easy. However, when negative thoughts and feelings take root early in life, they can build powerful thought patterns that form habits of thinking. Before long, we begin to think in ways that limit our growth and self confidence. We begin to doubt ourselves and feel dissatisfied – we are unable to build anything substantial in life. We become afraid to find solutions to challenges and feel unworthy, even when we do accomplish important things. The deeper these thought patterns take root, the lower our self esteem falls, until we cannot envision what it is like to feel confident about ourselves.
Low confidence:
Not being confident is sometimes hidden by other behaviours used to compensate for the deeper rooted, more painful feelings we wish to avoid. Psychologists tell us that low confidence often masks itself under a false front of superiority, perfectionism, over self reliance, kindness or humility, arrogant or attention-seeking behaviour, hyper-critical behaviour or religious fanaticism. All of these behaviour patterns are meant to shield us from the underlying feelings of sadness, inferiority, fear or insecurity. They allow us to compensate for these unacceptable or painful feelings by giving us a false sense of being okay or right or better than those around us, but they are not long term solutions – we need to build a better foundation in our lives.
Easy steps on how to be confident
I. Appraising yourself
Being able to build confidence is about liking yourself and appreciating your talents, abilities and attributes, such as problem solving and finding solutions to life’s challenges. This does not mean becoming egotistical or vain. It merely means acknowledging your good traits and qualities. The self concept – how you think about yourself – has a great deal to do with your confidence. If you continually tell yourself you are a failure, a loser, a poor student or whatever terms you use to put yourself down, you are feeding your lack of confidence and you will build a negative attitude. You are reinforcing what others wrongly caused you to feel about yourself. If you accept that they were wrong, or perhaps ignorant in doing this to you, why would you chose to do the same thing to yourself? It is time to build a more confident approach to life!
II. Basic solutions for bettering yourself and owning the key to success
- Try out positive thinking “be confident”
- Look for new solutions through challenging times
- Recognize your beliefs and build on them
- Value your targets and be confident in them
- Profit from positive feedback
- Allow yourself praise day after day
- Take action on solutions you rely on
- Forgive those people who have abused you
- Make time for self improvement every day
Source article: A Positive Journey