We relate to life through our experiences. The more conscious this relationship is, the better we understand ourselves and our experiences. But when our relationships exist at the level of instinctive reactions, we don't understand what happens to us, and we don't learn from life.
The type of relationship that we establish with our experiences determines the dimension we give our lives. Life can be a matter of simply enduring whatever happens to us, or else it can be an opportunity to learn, to unfold, to expand our possibilities.
We understand the significance of our experiences depending on the degree of consciousness we have acquired, so in order to deepen our relationship with life, we need to expand our state of consciousness. That is, we have to constantly redefine the meaning of life until our definition encompasses all of reality.
When the expression "my life" is reduced to what happens inside the small nucleus of my personal interests, my relationship to life is limited to my particular circumstances. When "my life" includes the society in which I live, my relationship to life expands to include that society. When "my life" is all the reality human beings can comprehend with their consciousness, my relationship with life embraces all of humanity and the entire universe.
But let's put all this in practical terms: what difference does it make whether I define “my life” in one way or another?
As long as our view of life is reduced to our personal circumstances, we identify with the things that happen to us: we fear the future, we hold on tightly to our possessions, and we suffer in our ignorance. When experiences cause us to suffer, our relationship with life might become bitter, resentful and pessimistic. Yet, when we do succeed at something or we experience an unexpected happy change, even for a moment, we might feel that life is wonderful and full of significance. When others suffer, it matters to us only to the extent that it affects us personally. We see the evils of the world as something foreign, outside of ourselves, "out there." The problems that come from natural causes or which all human beings endure become personal tragedies when they happen to us. Misfortune takes us by surprise and makes us think life is meaningless.
Even when we are not suffering from anything in particular, when we have all we could ever need, we might still think that our lives are meaningless. Self-enclosed as we are, we do not know what to do with the blessings we have. Our idea of happiness is an illusion-we think that to be happy is to avoid the laws of life: not to have to face adversity, uncertainty, decline and death.
A harmonious relationship with life leads to a universal outlook which includes simultaneously the particular and the general, the personal and the whole span of reality. With such an outlook we are able to distinguish between the aspects of life that human will can control and those it cannot. When we have a conscious relationship with life, we learn to take what happens to us as a means of participation. This means that instead of interpreting something painful as a curse or something pleasant as a deserved privilege, we come to see the experiences of life as a means of sharing with all human beings. We accept each experience as an inseparable part of an event, which is, simultaneously, a universal, social, familial and personal happening. We place our painful experiences within the suffering of all humankind, and we discover happiness in what is good for everyone.
Author and Source: Jorge Waxemberg