Suffering can include the most profound happiness within it. We often think of suffering and happiness as exclusive. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Often the greatest happiness is found within suffering precisely because it is painful. Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela and Sitting Bull, to name but a few, endured great suffering at the hands of others. It is implausible to think that they did not experience happiness (and even delight) within the suffering they experienced knowing that they were achieving greatness and actualizing their potential (and the potential of their people) through the hardships they suffered.
Suffering is not an indictment of our self-worth. In Western culture, there is a deeply rooted belief that any type of suffering, whether it be financial, physical, emotional, familial, etc., is the result of being “unworthy.” If we believe this to be true, then our legitimate suffering is compounded with needless suffering.
Suffering is not an indictment of our self-worth. In Western culture, there is a deeply rooted belief that any type of suffering, whether it be financial, physical, emotional, familial, etc., is the result of being “unworthy.” If we believe this to be true, then our legitimate suffering is compounded with needless suffering.
Success and comfort are like wheels. Those who are on top will one day be at the bottom and those who are on the bottom will one day be on the top. Bear in mind that our suffering in no way reflects who we are as people. Oftentimes, worthy and decent people suffer while cruel and indecent people experience seeming comfort.
Suffering is a normal part of parenting, marriage, working, and every other worthwhile endeavor. If we are in a constant state of suffering and anguish then something is most likely not as it optimally should be. However, periodic suffering in all areas of life is normal. Every good marriage has periods of discord and uncertainty.
Suffering is a normal part of parenting, marriage, working, and every other worthwhile endeavor. If we are in a constant state of suffering and anguish then something is most likely not as it optimally should be. However, periodic suffering in all areas of life is normal. Every good marriage has periods of discord and uncertainty.
Every healthy parent/child relationship goes through phases of disrespect and resentment with our children or parents not doing what we think they ought to be doing and us not doing what they think we ought to be doing. Jobs, homes, neighborhoods, and communities enter and leave our lives based on need, interest, and a variety of other factors, which are often based on suffering.
Lobsters are soft animals with hard shells that do not grow. When lobsters outgrow their shells they climb into a rock cleft. They face the uncertainty of being swallowed up by another animal or of being swept away by the current. Yet imagine if lobsters stifled their discomfort rather than using it as a catalyst for growth: they would be a miniature species. We can emulate lobsters by accepting suffering as a sign that its time for growth and renewal. The bottom line is that periodic suffering is part of every aspect of our lives and it need not be “bad.” Suffering is what it is and what we make of it. Not pleasant, but generally not unbearable or unacceptable.
Take a moment and ask yourself what you accomplish through the suffering you endure.
The main thing to remember is that comfort is very much a state of mind attained by self-growth, personal development, and doing good for others and for ourselves.
Lobsters are soft animals with hard shells that do not grow. When lobsters outgrow their shells they climb into a rock cleft. They face the uncertainty of being swallowed up by another animal or of being swept away by the current. Yet imagine if lobsters stifled their discomfort rather than using it as a catalyst for growth: they would be a miniature species. We can emulate lobsters by accepting suffering as a sign that its time for growth and renewal. The bottom line is that periodic suffering is part of every aspect of our lives and it need not be “bad.” Suffering is what it is and what we make of it. Not pleasant, but generally not unbearable or unacceptable.
Take a moment and ask yourself what you accomplish through the suffering you endure.
The main thing to remember is that comfort is very much a state of mind attained by self-growth, personal development, and doing good for others and for ourselves.
Author and Credits: Ben Klempner