Before you sit down to meditate or do any kind of spiritual practice, find yourself a mirror and a quiet place. Use whatever techniques you know to get yourself into a relaxed state.
Now take a good, long look at the person there in that mirror. Who is s/he really? Look deep into his/her eyes and find the human being there, the person who is, like all sentient beings, just doing the best s/he possibly can.
Be gentle. Be kind. Be soft. Be friendly. And as you do all of that, generate a feeling of warmth and love for that person and tell him or her with all your heart:
"Dear Me,
I love you. May you be happy. May you be at ease. May you be free from suffering.
I love you. I’m here. I will protect you and support you until your last breath.
There is nothing you can ever do to lose my love and respect. I will love you through despair, defeat, joy, and delicious contentment. I am braver than failure and stronger than doubt. I will stay with you through it all.
Your love and support is not just for the world around you but also for the world that exists within you."
Say this again and again, all the while looking deeply into your eyes.
We can learn to be our own best friend. If we do, we have a friend for life. We can buoy ourselves up, give ourselves comfort and sustenance the times when there is no one else.
~ Mildred Newman & Bernard Berkowitz
Every great sage, guru and Spiritual Master has pointed to a great, life-shattering truth: other people, including your wife, husband, partner, friends, parents, siblings, daughter, son, grandchild and grandchildren will never make you happy and whole. Never. EVER.
Your occupation, retirement, hobbies, dreams, aspirations and socio-economic status will also NEVER make you complete. Why? Without first learning how to enjoy, appreciate and respect ourselves, we will never truly be able to enjoy, appreciate and respect the other people and things in our lives.
If we fail to put in the painful and strenuous effort of making peace with our hypocritical, deceptive, weak and sickly selves towards the cultivation of self-love and understanding, we will forever be like everyone else in society: running about like headless chickens trying to gain love, acceptance and validation in an endless futile cycle of chaos, confusion, disappointment and perpetual emptiness.
“Lift up the self by the Self
And don’t let the self droop down,
For the Self is the self’s only friend
And the self is the Self’s only foe.” ~ Bhagavad Gita 6:5
Remember: “The most effective way to achieve right relations with any living thing is to look for the best in it, and then help that best into the fullest expression.” (J. Allen Boone)
Any living thing includes yourself, and that’s what’s true: to achieve right relations with your self, and to be your own best friend, you must look for the best in your self, you must feed the poor, forgive the offensive, and love the ‘despicable’ within you. Not to get it to stay the way it is, but precisely so that you have a hope of helping it become a better version of itself. You must lift your self up; and not let your self, or its smile, droop down, so that you have a leg, or a hope, to stand on. Be a Friend. Something in you knows how – easy.
Authors and Credits: